You Know I Am
by Aksannyi
Summary: Two adventurers, married yet not to each other, find each other under the Jugner Forest stars. Completed 23 September 2007, Contains explicit sex.


I sat on the hilltop with Dannock and leaned against the tree. Who says Jugner Forest isn't a superb place to spend your time?

Dannock and I often come here as a retreat from the busy cities of Jeuno and Aht Urhgan, where all of the shouting, footsteps clacking as people run by, and general noise of a busy epicenter can get to you after a period of time. Even the smaller cities have become crowded with adventurers young and old, and the forest was the perfect getaway from all that.

Dannock and I have been friends for ages, and we've been doing battles together for almost as long. We share a zest for adventuring, unlike our respective spouses.

"She just doesn't get the whole adventuring thing, Naala," he said, breaking the silence, and practically reading my mind. "I can't pull myself away from this life. I love it. I have asked her to join me, but she never will. She wishes I could stay at home with her but …" He trailed off.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. Tannel comes out with me sometimes, but he just doesn't have the drive for it the way we do." I felt it again, deep in the pit of my gut, that niggling feeling that I'd married the wrong hume. The more time I spent with Dannock, the less time I wanted to spend with my husband.

It seemed that the two of us had begun to forge a bond that we shouldn't have in the last few months, as we spent more and more time together. We would joke with each other, tease each other, flirt with each other … and every time, I'd wonder if he was serious or if it were just some game … if he really wanted to just go home to his wife and be with her, or if he was more like me than I thought – if he went home and lay awake all night wishing I were in his bed instead of the one he married. I didn't know where to draw the line between fantasy and reality sometimes, it seemed. I always kind of hoped that when I flirted with him, he'd take me up on my offer.

"Naala." I snapped out of my trance, and looked at him. I smiled nervously. If only he knew what I was thinking.

"Sorry … I was just … thinking."

"About me?" he teased. Again with the teasing.

"Of course," I played back. What else could I do? "Are you thinking about me, too?"

"You know I am," he said softly, almost a whisper. It took my breath away how he said it, almost like he wanted me to believe it, that it wasn't just a game.

_Did_ he want me to believe it?

"Dann …" I paused. "Do you wish Malelle was here with you right now, instead of me?" Curse me, why did I ask that question? And as soon as it came out of my mouth, I dreaded hearing that he _did_ want her to be here with him, and not me.

"No," he said, and before I knew what was happening, his lips were on mine. Tentatively at first, as though he didn't know how to tread until I kissed him back. And as I kissed him, I knew … I knew that whatever doubts I'd had about his intentions with all his innuendo were unfounded, and that there really was something brewing between us. I wrapped my arms around him.

The kiss deepened, and I began to feel something else entirely that I hadn't felt before with Dannock – need. I needed to feel his arms around me, feel him kissing me. I needed _him_. "All this time …" I whispered between kisses, "I never knew if there was truth behind the things you'd say to me." I kissed his neck, nibbled on his earlobe as he pulled me close to him..

"Naala, I've wanted to kiss you for so long …"

I pulled him closer to me, and felt his tongue inside my mouth once more. I moaned into him. Kissing Dannock was incredible, truly incredible, and there were no other words to describe it.

I felt his arms reaching under my armor, first to touch my stomach, and slowly trailing upwards to cup my breast in his hand. Never could I imagine a hand would feel so good, but just feeling Dannock's touch sent shivers down my spine that settled in my most private region. I tugged at his hauberk, willing him to take it off. He obliged, and quickly removed my own cloak, freeing my breasts with one quick touch of his hands.

He stared a minute, taking the sight of me in, and finally gasped in awe as he hoarsely whispered, "They're beautiful," before putting his hands on them again. I shivered with pleasure at just the thought of him touching me, let alone the action itself. I hungrily nibbled at Dannock's neck as he cupped my breasts in his strong hands.

"Naala," he whispered, and I peered up at him. The intensity in his eyes was almost too much for me to bear, and I could tell he wanted me as badly as I wanted him.

"Dannock," I breathed, looking at him intently, "I want you."

"You know if we do this now, there is no going back," he warned, and I nodded in agreement. For just a second, I thought about the husband and wife we were leaving at home, but dismissed the thought entirely. This was _our _moment.

I lifted my mouth to his again, and kissed him – tenderly at first, and then hungrily, as I reached my hand down into his breeches and freed his manhood from their tight grasp. I gasped as I felt him in my hands, and he gasped in return as I started to stroke him.

"Here," he said, and he lay down on the ground, pulling me on top of him so that I could reach him more easily. I massaged him with my hand, slowly at first, stroking him softly and tenderly, and then building in intensity. I could tell he was enjoying the feel of my hands on him. I kissed him sweetly on the mouth, and eyed him coyly as I made my way down his body … down to his nipples, where I suckled teasingly for a few seconds, and then down to his navel, where I teased him with my tongue, until I finally took his length into my mouth. He moaned with pleasure, and he gasped as I started to move my mouth back up his length.

Slowly, gently, I pleasured him with my tongue, suckling on his member as he caressed my hair with his hand. I felt a shiver run straight down to my core as I realized what I was doing and with whom, and I knew that I needed him, in every way I could possibly have him. I continued the sweet torturous foreplay, taking him slowly into and out of my mouth and caressing the tip of his manhood with my tongue, until finally I stood up and freed my body from the remaining armor on my body. I felt Dannock's gaze as I pulled the final piece of clothing from my body and I stood there naked before him, daring him to make love to me.

He sat up enough to pull me by the hands so that I toppled onto him, and he kissed me hungrily with need. I could feel his erection hot against my body as he slid his finger into me, caressing my moist center with his skilled hand. I clung to him.

"Dannock!" I moaned, thankful that only the trees were near enough to hear me. He expertly moved his finger in and out of me, causing my body to ache for him even more. I kissed him everywhere I could reach, his face, his neck, his hear, his shoulder. I dug my nails into his shoulders as he pleasured me, and I begged him, "Take me now!"

He pulled from me for just a moment and looked at me intensely, assuring himself that I truly wanted him as badly as he wanted me, and without another word, he slowly began to fill me with his member. I moaned with pleasure when I felt him enter me completely, and I kissed him hungrily as he lay there with me for just a split second, which seemed like an eternity of nothing but him and I, together - one.

_And then he began to move._

Slowly at first, he pulled himself from me, pausing for just a second before entering me once again. I gasped with pleasure at how good it felt as he pulled from me again, and he moaned as he dove into me once more. I began to move with him as he thrust himself into me, clinging tightly to him as our motions gained in intensity until, suddenly, miraculously, we came together with a force so strong, not even Promathia himself could pull us apart. The pleasure rocked my body, sending me on a wave of ecstasy so grand I felt I would never come down. I felt Dannock shudder as he came into me, and I held to him dearly as we descended from our high together. He whispered my name softly in my ear as we drifted off together on a beautiful sea of sleep. "Naala," he whispered, and nothing sounded more beautiful to my ears as my name from his lips in that exact moment.

I may have lain with him for years, for all I knew, before we came to, and as I snuggled next to him under the Jugner stars, I knew I loved him. I had loved him for months, perhaps years …

"Naala," he whispered to me again, "Should we be going home?" And there it was, guilt.

Not guilt for what I'd done to Tannel, but that I'd allowed Dannock to cheat on his wife. That I'd contributed to Dannock cheating on his wife, and as I lie there naked in his arms, I wondered if he would leave me now to be with her; if this would end whatever beautiful love we might have shared.

"Dannock." I looked at him, trying to mask what I felt. "I don't want to go back to my house. And … I …" I paused. I didn't know how to put it in words, so I gave up. Resigned, I asked, "You need to go home, don't you?"

"Yes, I suppose I do," he said, and he stood up. I tried not to let the lump well up in my throat as he passed me my cloak. So this was shame. I could love a man, but he would not love me back, then.

"Was this …?" I trailed off.

"This was not a one time thing, Naala, by a long shot."

"But you're not going to divorce her, are you?" There, I said it.

"What?!" He pulled his body armor over his head. "Well, what about you? You're going to go home to Tannel and act like nothing happened, aren't you?"

"But I'm _not_, Dannock. Our relationship has been over for a long time, and it took me making love to you to see that … to see that … you can't be married to someone when" – _Say it!_ – "when you're in love with someone else." I bit my lip, waiting for the backlash that was sure to come. Here was where my world would fall apart, where Dannock could truly hurt me.

He kissed me, completely surprising me. "Naala, I didn't get to tell you before all this happened, but Malelle is divorcing me. I have the papers right here and all I have to do is sign them and turn them into the consul in Jeuno. She just doesn't understand me, or the adventuring lifestyle, and she wants a husband that will be home with her every night, working as a Bastokan scientist or something. That's not the life I wish to leave. Even after all my attempts to make it work with her, I knew deep down that it wouldn't work." He stopped, and took a breath, but I knew he wasn't done speaking.

"And as I realized it wouldn't work, that's when I found you, Naala. Of course, I had known you for over a year by then, but I began to realize that you and I … are so compatible together; we want the same things in life. I didn't know how to approach a woman who was married, though."

"Not _happily_ married," I supplied.

"Yes, but I didn't know that until later," he said, "long after I'd already fallen in love with you."

I looked up at him then, and I could see that what he said was true. How could I have doubted that there was love for me in his heart?

I hugged him, held him tight to me and let him put his arms around me. Let him put his love around me. I choked back a fit of happy tears, and smiled as I hugged him tighter, vowing I would never let go.

"Now, before we go back to San d'Oria, there's one more thing I must know," he said, pulling slightly away and holding me by my arms.

"What's that?"

"Would you like to adventure with me for the rest of our days?"

"Are you asking … what I think you're asking?"

"You know I am."


End file.
